


Excuses, Excuses

by Leisey, livinglittlelie



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Collab work, F/M, everyone is oblivious, specially our favourite silly magical children, yet another fake dating au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-11
Updated: 2017-09-30
Packaged: 2018-11-12 21:27:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11170413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leisey/pseuds/Leisey, https://archiveofourown.org/users/livinglittlelie/pseuds/livinglittlelie
Summary: When their superhero-time disappearances were starting to grow notorious, and their excuses were starting to run short, Ladybug and Chat Noir agree to get an accomplice, someone who needed as many excuses as they did and wouldn’t ask anything about it. A fake relationship was the most logical way to approach it, right?What they didn’t consider was that they would unknowingly start fake-dating each other.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! Livinglittlelie here.  
> This first chapter was written by Leisey. She's let me post this because I was in the middle of my massive update, and she was too tired to post it herself. I guess she'll add some comments when she wakes up.
> 
> So! Leise and I've been friends for almost a year, and we reaaaally wanted to work together in a project. Bug said she wanted to write a FakeDating!AU, and I began throwing some ideas and well, this was born. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this little project of ours!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leisey here!
> 
> Now that I'm awake and functioning, I can say that for the first person who picks up on the little Australian-ism I slipped in here, I'll write you a oneshot. It's short and quick, but it's something that us Aussies say a lot (and confuse the rest of the world with). Livinglittlelie can vouch for me, I confused her too until my Australian-ness started rubbing off on her.
> 
> That said, I hope you enjoy our fic!

As someone who routinely had to sneak out of class, Adrien noticed when someone else was doing it. He was sure that Marinette wasn’t sneaking out fight akumas, but her ‘bathroom breaks’ and ‘family emergencies’ often coincided with Adrien’s attempts to sneak away and transform.

Adrien noticed and got an idea.

It was a stupid idea. It was a _crazy_ idea, but he was getting desperate. Other people – mainly Alya and Nino – were starting to pick up on the fact that he went missing all the time. There were only so many shower and photoshoot excuses he could give people before they got suspicious.

… It wasn’t a totally unappealing idea.

He shook his head, banishing the thought. There was no way he was opening up _that_ can of worms. Not today. No thank you.

Even though he had the idea, he had no way to go about implementing it. The whole thing was just so outlandish that Adrien had no idea where to start.

Well, talking to Ladybug about it would probably be a good idea.

Adrien’s cheeks burned at the thought.

It was going to be an awkward patrol.

* * *

“My Lady, can I talk to you?”

He and his partner were perched on the Eifel Tower, sitting side by side. Their patrol was finished and were simply taking in the beautiful view of Paris at night time.

Ladybug raised an eyebrow and smirked, “I thought we have been talking?”

He sent her an unimpressed look. Was this what she felt like whenever he punned?

… Pfft. Of course not. His puns were hilarious.

“You know what I meant.”

She gave him an amused smile but nodded, “What’s wrong, _Chaton_?”

Chat hesitated, not quite knowing where to begin. “Well, we both know that we’re not actually five thousand years old, right?”

Okay, well, that wasn’t the worst beginning he could have gone for.

“Riiiiiight,” his Lady replied, drawing out the word to show her confusion.

“And we know that since we’re not five thousand years old, we’re actually young enough to go to school, yes?”

Ladybug snorted, “You’re worried about talking about school? Chat, out of the two of us, which one dropped their textbook in front of the girl who runs a blog about us?”

“Oh. Right.”

“I think it’s pretty obvious I go to school. I figured you did too; you don’t look five thousand years old to me.”

“Yeah, nah. Definitely not that old. Sorry. I forgot about the textbook incident.”

“So what’s wrong with your school?” Ladybug asked, concern lacing her tone.

Chat fought the urge to sigh, “It’s just that akuma attacks keep happening throughout the day and people are starting to notice that I keep disappearing. Not so much from home, it’s always easy to sneak away from home.” Chat pushed away the familiar, lonely feeling that came with his home life and continued on. “But school? I’m pretty sure my best friend is going to have a heart attack one of these days because of how worried I make him.” He paused. “Then again maybe not, because his girlfriend likes to run off to see the action so he’s kind of used to it.”

The corner of Ladybug’s mouth turned up at the corners, “Oh, she’s one of those types people, is she? I’ve got a friend like that; always charging off headfirst into danger. She drives me mad with worry.”

Chat idly wondered if she meant her friend charged off to akuma attacks or just danger in general? If it was the former, he wondered who was constantly at akuma fights other than him and his Lady? He shook his head, clearing the thought from his mind. He was here to talk about is (admittedly stupid) idea, not get caught up with whatever precious, tiny detail Ladybug gave him about her personal life.

“The thing is,” he went on, “is that I’ve been noticing that a girl in my class keeps disappearing at the same time. I didn’t think anything of it until my best friend said that it looked like she and I were sneaking off to make out.”

In actuality, Nino didn’t just say that. There was a lot of teasing and elbowing in the stomach and “Sure, man, you’re not dating. Whatever you say.”

“To clarify,” Ladybug said, “your friend thinks your dating this girl that keeps sneaking off?”

Chat nodded, “My best friend and his girlfriend; they keep giving me knowing looks.”

Ladybug laughed, “That’s hilarious.”

Chat pouted, “It’s _not_ , but it gave me an idea.”

“Oh here we go.”

He shoved her lightly on the shoulder, “Rude.”

She snickered, “Sorry, _Chaton_ , go on.”

“It’s stupid and I have no idea how to go about it, but I thought that maybe I could ask the girl who keeps sneaking off to fake date me. That way, when people asked me where I’ve been, I can just say that I’ve been off with her.”

Silence fell and Chat mentally cringed as his Lady just sat there in surprise.

“That’s –“ she eventually started.

“An awful idea, I know.”

“Kind of stupidly brilliant,” she finished.

“What?” That was _not_ what he was expecting her reaction to be.

“It’s a good excuse for sneaking off somewhere. I mean, the idea of fake dating somewhere isn’t a good idea, but in _this_ circumstance … it’s actually clever.”

Chat let out a sigh of relief and Ladybug raised an eyebrow at him. “What? Did you think I was going to scold you for suggesting it?”

“Well…”

“It is clever, _Chaton_. Hell, I may even use it. There’s a boy in my class that constantly goes disappearing and – _eep_! – okay, no, maybe not.”

He frowned at her in confusion. What was that noise she just made? And was she actually _blushing_?! “My Lady?”

“Or maybe I will, because it _is_ clever. But ahhhh – just – maybe not.”

“Are you alright?” He asked. He’d never seen her act so skittish before.

“Oh, I’m fine. Fine. Totally fine. I’m okay. I’m the queen of okay. Just the idea of fake-asking that guy out makes me nervous, you know? He’s so popular and I’m … not.”

“I refused to believe that you’re not adored by all of your classmates.”

She scoffed and muttered something that ended with, “Bourgeois.”

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

“Really though, my Lady, you’re _you_. I sure the guy – whoever he may be – would be delighted to fake date you.” Chat had to force down the jealousy that flared to life at picturing his partner dating someone else (even if it was just fake dating) and continued on. “And think of it this way: we’re doing it for Paris. To protect our identities so we can keep saving our city.”

Ladybug was silent before she eventually nodded. “For Paris. Right. For _Paris_. I can do that.”

“Shall we make an agreement then?” He asked, despite the fact that the idea of asking Marinette out made him quite nervous. “The next time we see our potential fake boyfriend and girlfriend; we ask them out?”

“And we tell them it’s fake, because pretending it’s real is just cruel. We won’t tell them the truth about why we’re sneaking off, but we tell them that it’s fake.”

“Of course,” Chat nodded. There’s no way he’d do that to Marinette. Pretending it was real was mean and wrong and just – _no_. Even if he did need to protect his secret identity, there’s no way he’d hurt his friend.

“Okay,” Ladybug nodded along with him. “Okay. We can do this. The next time we see them.”

The two superheroes shook on it and then went their separate ways. It was clear the both of them needed to be alone to think about what they’d just agreed to. Chat’s heart thudded in his chest as he made his way back home. Marinette. He was going to ask out and hopefully fake date his friend. All the while, his Lady would be fake dating the boy from her class (because there’s no way the boy would turn down Ladybug. That was just ridiculous).

But there was a very high chance Marinette would turn him down.

He gulped nervously. This would turn out alright, right?

What was the worst that could happen?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In where, somehow, everything goes as planned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there, Livinglittlelie here. Don't worry, we haven't forgotten about this story, it's just that we've been swamped with lots of projects (you'll find out relatively soon, and you'll like it, believe me). 
> 
>  
> 
> ~~I had to threaten Leise with posting an embarrassing picture of herself in order to publish this, you're welcome~~
> 
>  
> 
> Here it is chapter 2, I hope you enjoy it!

Marinette woke up calmly with the sunlight for once, not with the sound of her annoying alarm blasting off in her room, already late. She looked at the ceiling in confusion, and watched the dust dancing on the sunrays coming through her hatch. She looked down at her phone, and frowned at the time – it was early, like, _too_ early.

She turned to the side, completely determined to catch some more minutes of sleep, when a sneaky thought made way in her head, reminding her of the conversation she’d had with her partner the night before.

Her body sprung up with a start, and maybe a shriek came from her mouth, but she was too preoccupied with her growing anxiety to care. She also heard Tikki squeak, maybe she saw her flying from her pillow because of her sudden move, and she sent a fleeting thought her way. But her dread came first.

“Marinette, what’s wrong? What are you doing awake so early?” the confused voice of Tikki came from downstairs, and she felt one part of her – the one currently not drowning in anxiety – wincing on her behalf. So she _did_ throw her from her bed.

“I need to ask Adrien out today.”

Tikki floated again to her bed, looking a bit ruffled. “But that’s good, right? You’ve been wanting to ask him out for months already.”

“No! Most certainly not! I already had a panic attack every time I wanted to ask him out in the past, let’s not mention my fidgety behaviour around him every time he passes my way. He probably thinks I’m weird, and he won’t want to go out with me. Then my heart will be crushed, and I will end up living alone with a black cat as my only companion.”

Tikki rolled her eyes at Marinette’s theatrics, but chose not to mention anything about it. She already knew how her wielder could get when her running thoughts went ahead of her.

“Marinette, I really believe that Adrien doesn’t think you’re weird, although I really think you should start opening up a bit more to him. You both are missing what could be a really nice friendship because of that.”

“I… I know.” Marinette clutched at her bedsheets, and frowned. “It’s just… I can’t think when he’s around. My hands get clammy, I lose control of my mouth, and my brain seems to completely shut down because of the pressure. I really tried to overcome those feelings, but it’s difficult.”

“What about the time he helped you with your uncle?”

“Huh? Oh.” She let go of the sheets and started playing with a strand of hair absentmindedly. “I was so worried about my uncle that I… forgot I had to feel nervous around him?”

“Maybe that could be of use when you talk to him?”

Marinette frowned. “What, thinking of my uncle every time I talk to him?”

“No!” Tikki giggled against her little hands. “Just remember the reason why you’re talking to him, don’t focus on the fact that you’re _talking_ with him.”

Wait. That could actually work. It wasn’t the first time that she had lost her skittish behaviour around him because she was worried about something else; be it her uncle, the UMS tournament or even one or two Akuma attacks, so maybe she could do it! Maybe she could follow Chat's plan and ask… ask him…

“But I have to ask him out, Tikki! How am I even going to forget about it when I’m addressing a subject that makes me feel like this!? I can’t!” 

The little god crossed her arms and patted herself on the chin. “But you’re not asking him out, not really. After all, all this is so you get an excuse to explain why you keep on disappearing at the most inconvenient of times.” She floated around her, a cheerful smile on her face. “See it as a mission for Ladybug! You just need to remember Chat’s words, and you’ll be able to follow the plan.”

Would she, really? Everything that Tikki had said made sense, but she wasn’t so sure she could apply it to the situation in hand. She could already see herself combusting in her place before even talking to him. It would be a total disaster, and what would she do then?

Then, Chat Noir’s words came to her mind. She wasn’t doing this for herself, she was doing it for the sake of Paris. She was Ladybug, and she was responsible for everyone’s lives, and if that meant that she had to somehow swallow her nerves and ask his crush to be her fake-boyfriend, so be it.

With a renewed resolve, she nodded at Tikki, determination gleaming on her eyes.

“You’re right. I can do it.”

* * *

“I can’t do it!” Marinette wailed from the pillar she was hiding. Checking out that no one was around, Tikki opened her pouch and frowned at her wielder.

“What’s wrong? You were so sure of yourself just some minutes ago.”

 Marinette covered her face with her hands. “But I hadn’t seen him then! How could I think this was a good idea? This is, most definitely, the worst idea ever. How did I even think I could ask Adrien out, even if it was faking?”

She rested her head on the pillar, and sighed in defeat, trying to slow down her heart. She understood Chat’s reasoning, she really did. And it was such a good idea, but maybe she hadn’t chosen the best boy to ask out. Maybe she could ask someone else, like Nathanael, or Max, that would be way easier.

But what would she tell them? They would want to know why she keeps on disappearing, and she wouldn’t be able to give them a straight answer. Then they would become suspicious, and maybe a bit curious to know where she’s vaulting off without saying anything. And that would put her identity at risk, right?

So as things went, the only person she could think of that wouldn’t question her would be Adrien, because he was at the same situation as her. She didn’t really know where he went, but she knew better than to ask about it. He wanted his privacy, and she would respect that, and she was sure he would respect hers.

Moreover, Alya would become suspicious if Marinette suddenly started going out with someone else, when she had been mooning over the blond boy for months now. But going out with Adrien? She would totally fall for that (well, maybe she would need to think of a credible background story for the two of them, but that could be fixed).

So really, he was the perfect candidate for being her fake-boyfriend. If only it wasn’t so difficult to actually ask him…

No. she couldn’t afford to be so fidgety. She had to do it. She was Ladybug, she could do it! She had ridden on a dragon, jumped inside the mouth of a T-Rex and fought evildoers on a regular basis. She had faced stuff of nightmares, sure asking Adrien out wasn’t so scary, right?

“Hello, Marinette!”

“ACK!”

Marinette gripped the edges of the pillar so she didn’t fall. She turned around, just to see Adrien looking back at her, a bit worried. His hair was perfectly styled, his clothes were perfectly tailored, and his face was simply perfect. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, his frown deepening.

“Adrien! Yes! Yeah. You just… startled me, that’s all.”

“Oh.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry for surprising you.”

“N-no! it’s not your fault! Don’t worry about it. It’s just me, being silly.” She began playing with the tip of one of her pigtails, trying to quell down her nerves. “So… you wanted something?”

He looked surprised in start, and then he looked… nervous? He averted his gaze to the side, fidgeting slightly on his feet, and he rubbed his nape again. And, if Marinette was seeing right, he had the softest of blushes on his cheeks. Was he… was he blushing? Why? Had she done something to embarrass him? Hopefully not.

He took a deep breath. “Okay, this is going to sound awful. I… I have a very important favour to ask you, and I need you to keep it in secret.”

That got her full attention. She let go of her hair and focused on the boy in front of her, forgetting that she was feeling jumpy just by talking to him mere seconds ago.

“What is it?”

“Okay… Okay. So, these days I’ve been noticing that you… keep disappearing from time to time. Not that I judge you! I kind of have the same problem. That’s the root of the problem, actually. Because we often go missing at the same time, and I came up with this idea that, now that I think about it, is totally stupid and I should really stop talking, because I’m rambling.”

Marinette frowned, confused. Some part of her mind wondered if their roles had been reversed, when it was him and not her the one fidgety and ramble-y, but it was casted aside in her need to understand what was going on. 

Adrien went on. “So what I’m trying to say is that I need your help. To cover for me when I go missing. I’m running out of excuses, and I can’t really say what I’m doing instead, so it would be perfect to have an accomplice. I can’t ask Nino, because he sucks at lying, and I can’t tell him what I’m doing either. Moreover, he’s going out with Alya, and it’s scary how much info she can gather.”

“I know. She’s my best friend.” In fact, the 80% of the info she’d gathered about Adrien had come from her sources. How she managed to find out all of that, she didn’t know. “So you want me to cover for you? But it’s as you said, I’m missing half of the time; I don’t think I would be a good cover.”

“Yes, if we said we’re together. That way both of us would have a reason why we’re not there. I mean, Nino already suspects as much, and it would be way more believable than just saying we’ve been at the bathroom for half an hour.”

Marinette winced. Maybe she’d used that excuse one too many times.

“So, let me get this straight. Whenever one of us has to leave, the other goes with them. But what would be our excuse?”

Suddenly, Adrien blushed bright red. It was a look she had never seen in the boy, and she felt tempted to identify which shade of pink were his cheeks and buy some fabric of the same colour. Maybe she could design a dress with it. But she was getting off track.

“That we’re… together. As in together-together.”

Her brain completely shut down at that. She knew she must have been staring way too much, as his fidgeting increased. However, even though she tried, she couldn’t stop staring.

“Are you… are you asking me to be your girlfriend?”

“Fake girlfriend.” He winced at the sound of it. “You don’t… we don’t have to do it if you don’t want. It was just an idea. A stupid idea. I shouldn’t have said anything. Let’s just pretend this conversation didn’t happen and-”

“Okay.”

That made him stop in his tracks. He blinked down to her, and suddenly, the most beautiful of smiles blossomed in his face, all tooth and unaltered glee. He placed a hand on her shoulder, and squeezed it.

“Okay? You- you want to do it?”

“Yeah.”

“Thank you very much, Marinette! I will make it up to you somehow. Do you want to meet this afternoon so we could talk about it?”

“Sure.”

He reached and gave her a hug before leaving. Marinette just stared ahead where the boy had gone his way, and let her body rest on the wall. Her pouch opened once again, and Tikki looked worriedly at the girl.

“Marinette, are you okay?”

“Did Adrien… did he ask me to be his fake girlfriend?”

Tikki bit her lip worriedly. “Yes, he did. Marinette, even though you feel disappointed right now, remember that you were going to do the same thing. Moreover, that doesn’t mean that your relationship can’t get better. I’m sure you’ll get to know each other because of it.”

“Disappointed?” She reached for her bag, and brought it to her face so she could be eye to eye with Tikki. Then, her mouth curved up in an ecstatic smile, and her eyes began shining. “Tikki! I’m far from being disappointed! Adrien asked me out! I didn’t have to ask him, he did! I couldn’t be happier about it!”

Her mission had been successful! Not only she had a proper excuse when she had to leave to be Ladybug, she also got Adrien to be her fake-boyfriend! Which, apart from being an excuse to spend more time with him, it also meant she could protect her identity fully, as he’d said he wouldn’t ask about why she kept on disappearing. This was perfect!

She needed to tell Chat Noir about it. Who knew? Maybe he managed to convince that classmate of his. Then, both of them would have the freedom to transform into their superhero personas without worrying about their constant absences.

What was the worst thing that could happen?


End file.
